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Femdom falls under the BDSM fetish and has been loved by people all around the globe. Even sexual partners who are getting bored of regular sexual intimacy can give femdom a try to spice things up between them. If you are looking to begin your femdom journey? If yes, It is advisable to go through the whole guide as it is full of femdom tips that can help you become a fetish model.
In this femdom for beginners guide, we will get to understand the below concepts-
- What is femdom?
- Types of femdom practices
- Femdom play scenes
- Tools and equipment for a femdom play
- Some safety tips for femdom beginners
What is Femdom? Who is it for?
Femdom is the dominance of women. It can be viewed as a reversal of the dominance of men. Traditionally, a man dominates a woman, and she submits to him by doing as he says. Simply put, female dominance is a role reversal in which women take charge and a man submits. Even though men don’t say it aloud, they want ladies or female partners to dominate them as a part of sexual role play.
Any female who wants to dominate their sexual partners or have an erotic session with a male by dominating them can be a femdom. However, the play has to have some ground rules for the submissive partner’s safety and to get proper pleasure out of the play. Consent and communication between a femdom and a sub is very crucial. The sub must give consent for every move the domme will make while in the play, and also continuous communication between the two ensures a safe and pleasureful femdom session.
Types of Femdom Practice
Female-led Lifestyle Relationships (FLR)
Female-led Lifestyle Relationships (FLR) are lifestyles where a woman takes on the dominant role in the relationship. These types of relationships focus mainly on control over the male partner, empowerment of the female partner, or both. Women are entitled to make financial decisions, and men must follow them accordingly.
As we can understand, Female-led Lifestyle Relationships extend beyond the bedroom into all aspects and can range from mild to extreme forms with key features as follows:
- Gender Reversed Role – Here, a woman plays the role of a man in a relationship.
- Emotional Backup – Women in this kind of relationship act emotionally stable and support their male partners emotionally.
- Decision Maker – Every day, household decisions are made by the woman in charge.
Worship and Adoration
A BDSM act in which one or more submissives respect a portion of the dominant’s body is referred to as worship. The penis (cock worship), the vagina/vulva (pussy worship), and the buttocks (ass worship) are among the frequently adored bodily parts. In this act, the submissive is viewed as a sexual inferior and is only permitted to lick, suck, or kiss the body part. But, the ways of worship are not limited to the body; we will see other ways here.
The following are some other ways of BDSM worship apart from body worship-
- Worship Through Service – The fundamental purpose of worship is doing what the domme loves. In worshiping through service, the domme gets to take any kind of service from the sub. Services like giving her a naked body massage, giving a bath, licking her feet, licking her butt hole, etc. Apart from sexual services, the domme may also ask for services like cooking, serving food, doing laundry, cleaning dishes, etc. Everything that makes the domme happy.
- Worship With Words – Praise and compliments are fundamental to worshiping and adoring a domme. An obedient sub will never run out of ways to praise and glorify his beautiful and powerful domme. He’ll use his words to remind her of her importance, beauty, intelligence, and sexiness.
- Worship With Gifts – Who doesn’t like gifts? A domme is no exception. A sub takes this opportunity to gift his domme the things she likes or BDSM toys to spice up their femdom play. The domme has the right to ask for expensive gifts like diamond rings, gold jewelry, and complete expenses for a vacation trip.
Pegging and Roleplay
A lady using a strap-on dildo penetrates a man’s anus during a sexual practice known as “pegging.” Many people refer to “pegging” by other terms such as “bend over boyfriend” (abbreviated BOB) because the concept is relatively new. The term “pegging” was coined by Daniel Keenan Savage, an American author, to describe a woman anally penetrating a man with a strap-on dildo in 2001.
A lot of men like having their anals penetrated due to the presence of an extremely sensitive organ called the prostate, which is located inside their butt. For many men, getting pegged by a lady domme is a fetish. Here, a lady plays the role of a male and uses her strap-on dildo to peg the male sub.
Financial Femdom Relationship
According to Wikipedia, findom, also known as financial femdom, is a fetish lifestyle activity in which a submissive is required to give all authority of their money to a dominant. The domme may also take charge of the sub’s bank account and demand money. Out of all the femdom practices, findom is the most interesting one. Here, a financial domme demands money from their subs, and subs give the money a findom needs without asking anything in return.
Subs find immense pleasure in fulfilling the demands of their domme, as it makes their domme happy. It seems unbelievable, but those who become a findom make a good sum of money from their subs.
Domination and Gentle Femdom
In the case of gentle femdom, things are a bit slow and gentle. Here, both the sub and domme decide to play the dominatrix game with low or no acts of giving pain to their partner. Gentle femdom focuses on sensuality, caring, and rewards rather than impact play, humiliation, and BDSM punishments. This type of play will be suitable for couples who are curious for trying out femdom but aren’t sure of torturing or dominating.
A gentle femdom exercises power by nurturing the dominant and ensuring their sexual wellness. Though a femdom uses softer versions of BDSM, the dom lady has control over the sub. This type of dom-sub relationship is exciting and natural, especially for playmates who are more interested in standard sexual experiences than hardcore kinks.
Must Read:
👉How to Become a Dominatrix? (The Complete Guide)
Femdom Play Scene Ideas for Beginners
Sensory Play and Deprivation
Sensory deprivation is one of the most common practices among partners during a BDSM play. Here, the dominant partner tries to deprive the submissive partner of one or more senses, usually sight and hearing. Their other senses, such as touch, become more sensitive to external stimuli, adding to their sensation of helplessness and alertness. This may lead to a really sensual experience.
The two most popular props used during sensory deprivation are blindfolds, which block the sense of sight, and earplugs, which block the sense of hearing. The domme’s focus is on improving the other senses, like touch or sensitivity. For example, a domme blindfolds her sub and also puts earplugs in the sub’s ears. Now, the other senses, like sensitivity to touch or feeling, are enhanced. These enhanced senses will give a more erotic experience than in general.
Role-Playing Scenarios
BDSM (domination and submission, bondage and discipline, and sadism and masochism) role-playing is a sexual activity in which two or more individuals act out a specific scenario or fantasy in which one person demonstrates power over another. This act can take place either online or offline, and since it is a BDSM act, one partner will act as a domme and another as a sub.
A dominating player, also referred to as a “top,” issues command during BDSM role-playing, and a submissive player, also referred to as a “bottom,” complies. Some players of the act change their authority over the other after every session and keep changing their roles and scenarios as per their fantasy. Some of the popular BDSM role-play scenarios are teacher-student, doctor-patient, master-slave, homeowner-maid, boss-employee, old-young, human-animal, etc.
Bondage and Shibari
Rope bondage is a commonly practiced BDSM act where the dominant partner uses a rope to restrain or restrict the movement of the sub. There are different types of bondages-
- Restrictive Bondage – The purpose of this type of bondage is to stop your partner from moving away from you.
- Predicament Bondage – In this type of bondage, the domme ties the sub in an uncomfortable position. So that the sub begs for mercy.
- Torture Bondage – The purpose of this type of bondage is to tie down the submissive so that the domme can torture the sub. Usually, domme and sub first decide to what extent they should take the act and a safe word to stop the play immediately.
Shibari is a contemporary rope bondage style that has roots in Japan. It is often referred to as “kinbaku” or Japanese rope bondage. “Kinbaku” means “tight binding,” and “shibari” means “tying.” The terms refer to the same kind of play and can be used interchangeably. In a nutshell, Shibari is the practice of tying someone up with ropes. Couples tie each other into specific positions for sex at times, while at other times, the fun is simply in the tying.
Impact Play and Power Dynamics
Impact play in BDSM involves hitting, slapping, stroking, etc., your partner while in the act. You can do all these with your bare hands and also with a BDSM toy you bought for play. Impact play usually consists of 2 parties, the dominant one or the top and the submissive one or the bottom. Some may consider impact play as abuse, but the very first rule of the play is to get the consent of the submissive partner to imply all these on him or her.
Impact play toys are designed to create a wide range of sensations on the surface of the submissive’s skin, such as stinging and thudding. BDSM toys like floggers, canes, paddles, etc., are supposed to make the sub feel the desired sensations.
A person in a BDSM scene who is in a position of power is referred to as a dominant, dom, domme, top, etc., while the person who is helpless is referred to as a submissive, sub, slave, or bottom. Being “switches” and switching between the dom and sub roles is something that many individuals love to do.
Power dynamics is relevant not only to sex but also to a variety of contexts. For example, a sub loves to clean the feet of a dom and also gets humiliated for not doing a good job. The punishment for this mistake may or may not include sexual exploitation by the dominant.
Tools and Equipment for Femdom Beginners
Strap-on Dildo
Doesn’t matter if you are a lady and wish to be a domme in a BDSM act. If you have a fantasy to penetrate your anus, then strap-on dildo is the best option. Strapping on a dildo can be a wholesome experience, and you may feel the dominative power you are looking for. Now penetrating a vagina or anus depends on your mood or fantasy because you have all the power in your dildo to do both.
Bondage Cuffs
Femdom tools like bondage cuffs can help you restrict the movement of your sub. If you want to give your sub punishment and don’t want to allow them to run, then an ankle cuff will hold them in their place. Wrist cuffs will resist their arms to restrict you while you punish them.
Leather cuffs are popular and classic, and the materials and widths of dominatrix bondage cuffs may vary. Some cuffs come with a lock and key, just like Police handcuffs. Leather cuffs with padlocks are examples of cuffs that come with locks and keys.
Blind Fold and Hood
Making someone temporarily blind using a piece of cloth immediately makes them submissive to the other. A BDSM mask also does the same thing but is designed differently and also covers the sub’s ears. Look for masks and hoods made specifically for BDSM use.
A good quality BDSM mask should be made with breathable fabric for air to circulate through. Other types of fabric or winter clothing from home should not be used for bondage since they can suffocate the sub.
BDSM Gag
Best femdom tool to make your sub quiet. If your sub is talkative and doesn’t know when to keep quiet, then use this BDSM gag specially designed for such subs. There are different sizes of gags available in the market. Choose the type of gag you want your sub to wear, as smaller gags are more comfortable than bigger ones. The type of gag you select depends on the punishment you want to give your sub.
Nipple Clamps and Cock Cage
Male or female, no matter which gender is your sub, all have nipples. Nipple clamps can used to torture them and make the subs bow down before you to show them some mercy by releasing their nipples. Many doms find it pleasureful when a sub begs them for something.
Cock cage is specifically for male subs, as their doms want to keep the cocks under their control. Many dominatrix use cock cages or chastity devices to control their subs getting an erection or orgasm. These cages are specially designed for those who have the fetish to control a sub-men’s erection and restrict him from masturbating.
Safety Tips for Femdom Beginners
Understand your Potential Partner
Before asking someone to be your sub, you should have complete details of that person. Just meeting someone in a cafe and randomly approaching them to satisfy your femdom fantasy is not a healthy way to do things. You also need to understand the fantasy of the opposite person and if he/she would like to be submissive in the BDSM play. The real intentions of that opposite person should be clear to you as he likes to be a sub, or all he needs is just sex via playing sub.
Check your Customer’s Background
Suppose you recently started your fandom services, and a customer books you for an on-site fandom service. You shouldn’t just rush into his house or call him in your place because that person may have a criminal history. All you need to do is verify all the information the customer gave you and then have a video call or a chit-chat to understand them better. Being a part of the femdom community in your area will help in many ways to cross-check customer details.
Establish a Safeword/Gesture
Before you start the play with your sub, make sure you guys have a safe word. A safeword or a gesture is very important as it helps the sub to make sure that the dom understands when to stop the play immediately. Words like “purple,” “red,” etc., or gestures like nodding, pointing fingers, etc., can be very useful for a dom to take control or come back to real-life status whenever they feel like it. Always remember that it’s better to be safe than sorry.
Never compromise on Hygiene
Fantasy can’t be your excuse to compromise on hygiene. Your hygiene, along with your sub’s, is very important. As a dom, make sure you choose someone who is visibly hygienic for a femdom play, as you don’t want to get sick after the play. Also, make sure you clean and sanitize all the toys you use in one session and do not use the same tools for another session of femdom without proper sanitization.
Especially toys like butt plugs, dildos, BDSM gears, etc., are to be cleaned every time after every session to be safe from any kind of infection or disease.
Use Toys Gently
BDSM toys are designed to give participants of a femdom play some extra edge in terms of pleasure. These toys are misunderstood as torturing devices by the newbies in the field. The word “torturing” doesn’t really mean torturing the submissive partner and harming them. For each and every act that a dom wants to try on a sub, the sub itself first has to approve it.
Using these toys aggressively may lead to damage to a sub’s body parts. In such a case, provide immediate medical attention to your sub.
Why Choose xModel by Adent.io to Start Your Femdom Journey?
So far in the femdom for beginners guide, you have understood what femdom is and got some really good femdom tips. Also, get exposed to toys that can enhance your pleasure in femdom play. After gaining all this knowledge, it’s time to implement it and make some money. Launching a fansite is the best approach if you are starting new and want to be a professional femdom services provider.
Using xModel by Adent.io may give you quick success in this field, as this adult fansite software can help you launch your femdom services website within a matter of days. xModel is the most sought-after fansite software by pornstars, adult content creators, cam models, etc. The script is designed by adult industry experts and is packed with monetization features to help the models skyrocket their incomes. The following are the monetization options that xModel offers-
- Selling Content – A model can shoot and upload content on her fansite and sell it to any users or fans who want to buy it. Content in the form of images, videos and stories is what a model can sell on her fansite.
- Wishlist Earnings – Imagine your fans sending you money for the items on your wishlist. That’s exactly what you can do if you launch a fansite using xModel. Your fans will have the opportunity to bear the cost of any item they want listed in your wishlist.
- Affiliate Marketing – This feature helps you earn extra revenue in addition to the revenue you generate from your fans. Using this feature, you will be able to host affiliate ads on your fansite and earn affiliate commissions.
Apart from all these, the xModel fansite software is highly customizable, which allows you to add any kind of new feature you want in your femdom site. The software is very cost-effective, and you get to launch the femdom site of your dreams in just a matter of days.
Conclusion
By going through this femdom for beginners guide, you must have got a detailed idea of what femdom really is and how you can become a dominant female. Various types of femdom practices and scenes have also been discussed for you to get a real-life outlook. Different types of tools and equipment which a professional femdom uses while doing a femdom play were also mentioned in this guide.
In the end, we also discussed the importance of safety and consent in a femdom play. Some femdom tips on safety were also discussed to make you aware of the most common safety practices for a femdom play.
